two-zero

two-zero

two-zero. 20. twenty.

Choices & The Perfect Balance

Choices & The Perfect Balance

Today has got to be my worse day ever since 2010 started. Or at least one of them.

What a messed up monthly shoot I had today!
92+91+92+85+91+90 = 541

Can this day get any worse after this post? I sure hope not. Everything is daunting on my mind and resolute now. Just what is it that I want!? Too much expectations on myself and I get an avalanche crushing me to the bottom. I feel so sick and tired of everything right now. Totally.

I went to the range today with a ready mind to shoot it right. But apparently, it turned out to be a ready mind to shoot it all wrong. My glove was slipping throughout the whole thing. I couldn't change the supporting grip because I couldn't get use to it. My target was as usual blur/smudged to the point I could not differentiate target white and target black. And I cannot find where the root of the problem is. Tried adjusting my spectacles. Did this did that. And....my emotions got the better of me. Yet again.

I think I won't mind it at all if someone just treats me as a physical punching bag and slap/punch me. I just feel so tired to retaliate.

I need to make a choice. To train is a must and a must to be more. But to train what: Prone or Air Rifle? The trade-in value of Prone is a lot of money. The trade-in value of Air Rifle is...time. Without training for Prone, it'll be hard for me to get into the national team. Without training for AR, it's equally bad because I'll never get beyond that stupid 572 boundary!

I'm feeling really restless and lethargic now. I've lost much of the mood to blog already.

Perfect balance...well it's a lot of things. Just take something, anything that you do. If you need to do it well, you need a well balance of brains and brawns. Ain't that it? But brains and brawns just don't cover enough ground. How about the 'air' and everything else? You go think about it. I'm done blogging for today...

number twenty

number twenty

quite a number of days more before that number 19 turns number 20...

well, everything just doesn't seem to fit in right these days. it feels so weird. it feels so wrong. and my guess is, it's probably just me.

my irritation point is getting negative. and i'm too easily annoyed these days.

honestly, i just feel like walking out away...
what should i do! i need a sign!

cuz everythin' just feels so wrong.
and everything's like a twister growing strong.