choices made. lessons learnt. hard.

choices made. lessons learnt. hard.

alright. tis post shldnt be typed at all. the updates for blog would actually come much later. so there shldnt be any post today or that soon. but i guess tis is a post which by all costs, is necessary for me to type and remember, indefinitely. and it goes out to all drivers too.

prolly i hit a pretty bad patch lately. nvr seem like the past 2 lunar years are working well for me(which includes tis year). oh. but wadever. i'll get straight to the story.

i was driving today. was on way back home. with 3 other passengers, my friends. but as i was taking the turn to the road twds my hse, the car skided. totally beyond movement. result: broken front bumper, blown right front tyre, right rear tyre slightly out of alignment, and i'm guessing a lot of other important parts either broke or got out of place too. *touch wood though*

dn bother asking me wad happened. i'm not gna speak another word about after today. i will only keep the experience gained in me for a lifetime(or even beyond, if there's any)

the unlikely thing is, tis has pretty much caused me to think of several other things:
1) purchase of a car
2) regrets and disappointment

3) advanced driving

with the repair cost that seemingly is gna cost pretty much worse than a bomb. i dno wad to say to dad. i wanted to pay part of it, but he's not willing to let me. considering the costs he's bearing. i really dn wna be another financial burden with an additional vehicle. and even so, with costs aside(although cost is the major concern of an additional vehicle), the experience has gave me 2nd tots of actually purchasing a car. i really dno if i can drive, safe, anymore. i'm not sure if it was my fault or was it the car's? though i'm pretty sure i contributed much to it. i shld prolly take a break frm the roads. how long? i've got no idea, totally zero.

the regret is getting on my nerves. it's one of those very few times that i actually feel that much remorse in a/an choice/decision/action i made/did. it's hard to describe. my dad told me not to do certain things whn he lent the car to me. i'm not sure if it was much of a promise. but i took it as one, and the disappointment in myself in keeping promises seems rocket high. the situation was so dangerous. there were 3 other passengers. and they were my frens. and i dn wan anything happening to them. i wan to make sure they're out of harm's way. but everything juz wasnt in place, the car went off. the driver probably sucked.  i dno wad i'm protecting.

*sighs* mayb afterall, i'm still an 18 year old "KID" that has too much adrenaline. reckless, inconsiderate, playful, irresponsible, selfish, disregardful of consequences, and wadever else u can into this category. i dno man. i dno. mayb public transport is still the best. i guess i just hav to suffer a little less slp, more fatigue and lactic build-up for going here there and everywhere for school, shooting and work. 

advanced driving is something on the long road. but nvrtheless, it's on my mind. and not until then, with today's experience in hand, i guess it'll nvr stop reminding of wad happened and wad to keep in mind off. i'm not gna let tis experience turn my interest off like that. it's juz gna make me stronger, even tougher. but learn it for real. use it only whn needed. and nvr abuse it. N-e-v-e-r. NEVER.

i'm juz glad everyone were unscathed. if they were, i dno wad i'll be like now (and definitely wun even be posting tis now)

to all drivers out there on the roads, whether u read tis or not, check your vehicle no matter how long or short ur journey is every single time and drive safe and cautiously. speed only whn necessary. dn try anything u are not confident of, or u hav not learnt b4. dn learn things the hard way like i did. some choices and decisions are minor. some are major. some are etched in ur mind for good. and some will make you regret for life. (a frank comment here: i think driving schools in singapore shld really teach pple how to handle the car better. i think their practical lessons pathetically suck.)

thks everyone. thks for ur concern and worry. i'm fine. i'll always be. i'm invulnerable. i'm superman, remember? =D

thks a lot, emberwolfe. tis smile is for u. =)