you know my name

you know my name

Arm yourself because no-one else here will save you
The odds will betray you
And I will replace you
You can't deny the prize it may never fulfil you
It longs to kill you
Are you willing to die?

The coldest blood runs through my veins
You know my name

e song itself may not make any link to my entry. but i would say it's a great song. it's e main title song from casino royale.

a lot of things seems to hav happened ard me, but rite now, i seem to b placed in a state of confusion. everyone ard me seems to b quite happy w wad they r in now, but that doesnt applies to me. haiz.

it's back to square one. back to e start to get her heart...to get ur heart. i dno if u still continue to read my blog. i dno if u still feel e way u feel when u talked to me during e sept holidays. those words u said. haiz. it seems like i dno anything anymore abt u. it seems i've lost so much things abt u after breaking for so long due to my Os. it seems as if i'm lost upon u.

nvrtheless, i did wad mention wad i wan to do. try again. try n try again n again. there's a lot of things i wanna talk again. i wanna make things clear. i wan to b w u. but my whole intention nxt yr is not to distract u w all these things. i wanna help u. help u ace ur Os. help u to improve. help u in every area i can help. it's more than juz help. i'm concerned abt u, concerned abt ur Os. i dare to say i love u more than ever. no girl has ever made me wept tears for her. no one except u. more so it was not only a day w tears.

i dno waz it gonna b. wadever ur decision is, i'll still definitely respect it. but that doesnt mean i will give up e tot of u being mine. i'll continue e wait, more determined than ever. till e day comes, You Know My Name. e name of e person that will persist on n will not give u up.

i wan to confess that as much as i wan to keep tis low profile. i still did share it w a few pple, 2 teachz, one who teaches u, one who doesnt. sry abt it. i cant help it. it's kind of difficult to share my prob w/o knowing who are involve in it. really sry. i didnt mean it.

to wad e future may hold, i hope u'll let me in into ur heart, even e least bit. i know it might b difficult. but once again, my sole wish is to help u all e way thru ur Os nxt yr. whether more pple will know abt tis, i dno. but i definitely wish that there'll b no more.

well juz hope u remb.
to e ends of e universe,
u r e one n only girl who is able to make me tear.
determination runs in me.
e wait will continue, no matter wad.
e love will stay true only to u.
cos i'm sure u know who i am,
wad i am, how i am like.
n i will always b e one i am

as long as
You Know My Name.

the end yet a new beginning

the end yet a new beginning

well well well...e Os hav definitely come to end for me. n guess wad. it's e end! wooh yeah man. hmmm...it's been a long journey n tough one. but that's obvious. it's a great relief that everything related to academics has ended. FOR NOW. e strange thing is that i still feel uncomfortable. something juz isnt rite. i'm suppose to feel super-relaxed, but somehow, stress or wadever u call it still engulfs me.

anyway, i dno. i cant b bothered now. it's e end. YES. but, it's a new beginning from now on. it's a start of a new chapter of my life. new things. new ROOM! new dreams. new lease of life.

well. everything's gonna change from now on. i dno wad e future ahead will b like. but i do know wad my actions will b. there's gonna b a lot of things i hav to do n many things to strive for.

my NEW room awaits my action:
argh!!...there's hell lot of things to do for my room. painting. decorating. building up knock-down furniture. finding e furniture i need at LOW COSTS but GOOD QUALITY......etc. argh...tis will literally take up at least 50% of my time for enjoyment n other things. i hav to search high n low over e whole island for cheap but good stuffs. that means i'll hav to travel from e east to e west, north to south, n even round n round SG.

HER. as i said i wun give up. n since it's after e Os, i will keep on trying, no matter wad.
so still, i wanna ask: is there still no chance at all? i really do wish to b able to b w u. but i know ur Os is nxt yr. n i know u shld focus on ur Os rather than on r/s matters. so wad i feel is that i wan to b w u but also i wanna help u. i wanna help u do well in ur Os nxt yr. i know that i may not hav e chance still, but i do hope u give me tis chance to at least help u in journey to ur Os coming nxt yr.

other things that r happening soon.
shooting camp. 4-6 dec. tis yr's one seems much interesting. e activities lined up r really engaging n is good. i'm expecting e camp to turn out to b much better than i expect.

a job? or mayb two jobs?....hmm, gotta consider some jobs though, i'm short of green pieces of papers. esp for paying that ferrari laptop of mine equipped w windows vista ultimate. it's gonnna cost me 3000 over odd. omg. many easy jobs w high pay though. heh heh heh....let's c how much i earn in one month.

X'MAS. hohoho. it's e end of e yr again. n xmas is here to bring gifts to everyone. well, of cos i'm not e santa claus...hahaha. but i do hav some gifts to buy for some pple though. hmm...money issue again. haiz.

so. that's a wrap. it's new journey from now on. Os hav end but my life hasnt. it's a new road ahead n i hope things r gonna get better.

until e nxt time...e flamin' phoenix
signin' out...!

one time. one chance.

one time. one chance.
let's do tis e way i wan.
or forget abt it.

it's been awhile since i've came here. but there aint much time for me to spend it here, today.

e written papers r starting tmrw, for me that is. n tis is it. tis is where it all starts n where it all will end. there's only one time to tis. n there's only one shot at each of e papers to come.

e bad thing is, i havent doing much serious preps for it. whether i can survive tis ordeal, n make a miracle out of it within e nxt 12 days, taz gonna depend on wad i'll do. it's getting scary now but wad it takes is perseverance n endurance for e nxt 12 days. it's a haunting reality - a terrifying one.

e good thing is...hmm well, it doesnt seems there's much of it though. haha. e only good thing i can say is that at least my mind is still staying positive n is keeping e hopes of a miracle happening alive (of cos together w wad i'm gonna do).

wad i'm missing now is e key again. tis time, it's e key of confidence. that key is hidden in me all along. n i hav to reach it, in order to achieve wad i wan.

so tis is it. 12 more days. waz it gonna b?
it's only one time. there's only one chance.
so let's do tis e way i wan it to turn out.
otherwise just forget it...

Ready To Fly...

I've been trying to open the door
To the secret of my destiny
And every new road I think is the one
Seems to lead right back to me

I've looked for a way to be wiser
A way to be strong
Now I see the answer is hiding
In me all along

And I'm ready to fly
Over the sun
Like a rocket to heaven
And I'm ready to soar
Right through the sky
Never dreamed I'd find something to lift me so high up
I always have wings
But I wasn't ready to fly

Restless, hopeless, and misunderstood
Like so many others I know
So busy tryin' to keep holdin' on
When I should've been letting go
I was given the gift to find it
The spirit inside me
But I never really imagined
All I could be

And I'm ready to fly
Over the sun
Like a rocket to heaven
And I'm ready to soar
Right through the sky
Never dreamed I'd find something to lift me so high up
I've always had wings
But I wasn't ready to fly

The answer to all of my wonders
Was right in my hands
Now it's time for me to discover
All that I am

And I'm ready to fly
Over the sun
Like a rocket to heaven
And I'm ready to soar
Right through the sky
Never dreamed I'd find something to lift me so high up
I've always had wings
But I wasn't ready to fly

I've always had wings
Now I'm finally ready to fly